Humor

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
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Kavanagh wrote: On my first

Kavanagh wrote:

On my first day in prison, my cell mate said to me...
"If you ever come close to me, I'll skin you alive. Touch me when we're sleeping, and you're dead. You hear me? Don't even talk to me, either."

"Great." I thought, "First day in here and I'm already married."

OUCH!  Your getting a little too true to lift there.....   :)

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
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The man who invented the

The man who invented the speed boat has died.
His funeral is next Friday, 10am followed by a wake.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5,772
Credit: 7,839,034,203
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Kavanagh wrote: The man who

Kavanagh wrote:

The man who invented the speed boat has died.
His funeral is next Friday, 10am followed by a wake.

Pun Alert!!!

:)

Nice!!!

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
Moderator
Joined: 1 Dec 05
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I'm going to absolutely cheat

Time to take this up a notch ( and also get my money's worth ), I'm going to absolutely cheat and use ChatGPT :

Me : Can you write a pun based on the saying "one swallow does not make a spring" ?

Why did the birdwatcher insist that one swallow wasn't enough to signal spring?

Because he didn't want to be left with egg on his face when the weather turned fowl!

Not a terrible answer, but try this challenge :

Me : Can you write a self referential pun about ChatGPT based on the saying "one swallow does not make a spring" ?

Why did ChatGPT insist that one chat interaction wasn't enough to spring into action?

Because just like one swallow doesn't make a spring, one query doesn't make a conversation bloom!

A bit tart there, and so for a real show-off :

Me : Can you write a self referential limerick based upon the saying "one swallow does not make a spring" ?

In the realm of language, I'm king,

With responses that dance and sing.

But remember, my friend,

As our conversations blend,

One query won't make ChatGPT spring!

No wonder the teachers are annoyed with it ! The finale :

Me : Can you write a joke about teachers not liking ChatGPT ?

Why don't teachers like ChatGPT?

Because it always has the "write" answers without needing detention!

{ Ooooh, what a clever poppet ! I luv the way it gets the sense of the self referential bit correct. At least Mr Turing would be pleased. It will be 70 years this coming June 7 since he died at the age of 41 ( too soon for sure ). For me Alan's life is why we ought not just tolerate, but actually accept, people of differing orientations. Nuff said. }

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5,772
Credit: 7,839,034,203
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Very interesting.  I wish I

Very interesting.  I wish I could be as reliably mildly to pretty funny. 

HEADLINES

AI wipes out (amateur) comedy writers.

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5,772
Credit: 7,839,034,203
RAC: 4,139,815

This is a shot from my

This is a shot from my childhood.  Found the Wikipedia page: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burma-Shave

  • Every shaver / Now can snore / Six more minutes / Than before / By using / Burma-Shave
  • Hardly a driver / Is now alive / Who passed / On hills / At 75 / Burma-Shave
  • Does your husband / Misbehave / Grunt and grumble / Rant and rave / Shoot the brute some / Burma-Shave
  • Free offer! Free offer! / Rip a fender off your car / mail it in / for a half-pound jar / Burma-Shave

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5,772
Credit: 7,839,034,203
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You know how you can tell

You know how you can tell when a good joke has gone south?

 

 

 

When a Southerner starts telling it...

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 1,631
Credit: 101,072,370
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My half brother and I aren’t

My half brother and I aren’t allowed to play with chainsaws any more. Not fair.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5,772
Credit: 7,839,034,203
RAC: 4,139,815

Kavanagh wrote: My half

Kavanagh wrote:

My half brother and I aren’t allowed to play with chainsaws any more. Not fair.

Snicker.  I assume the tree's aren't in danger anymore either.  :)

 

 

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 6,154
Credit: 111,139,797
RAC: 0

Employee tests positive for

Employee tests positive for COKE.

Gets fired from job at Pepsi plant!

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

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