Humor

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 6004
Credit: 111139797
RAC: 0

Paddy: Hey Murphy, I heard

Paddy: Hey Murphy, I heard you were arrested for annoying your neighbors by playing endless Engelbert Humperdinck songs. What happened?

Murphy: Police released me; let me go.

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 1566
Credit: 100415401
RAC: 13030

I have always licked my knife

I have always licked my knife when I've finished.
This gets some strange looks from the other surgeons.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5586
Credit: 7673222881
RAC: 1749187

Kavanagh wrote: I have

Kavanagh wrote:

I have always licked my knife when I've finished.
This gets some strange looks from the other surgeons.

Oh my.

Do you also autoclave your tongue?

 

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 6004
Credit: 111139797
RAC: 0

Why did the banker quit his

Why did the banker quit his job?

 

 

Because he was losing interest.

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5586
Credit: 7673222881
RAC: 1749187

RandyC wrote: Why did the

RandyC wrote:

Why did the banker quit his job?

 

 

Because he was losing interest.

Groan.

Maybe that was because of inflation?

 

You know.

Gaining weight.

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 1566
Credit: 100415401
RAC: 13030

My friend told me to put 50

My friend told me to put 50 quid on a horse named ‘Creosote’. I asked, “Is it any good?” He replied “It's great over fences”.

Richard

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 6004
Credit: 111139797
RAC: 0

There's no reason to get mad

There's no reason to get mad at lazy people...they haven't done anything.

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
Moderator
Joined: 1 Dec 05
Posts: 6534
Credit: 284700169
RAC: 113726

Very good joke there Randy.

Very good joke there Randy. Mind you, you have to be of the right generation to get the gag. ;-)

{ hmmmm ..... release me, and let me love again ..... dum de dum, la da da }

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 1566
Credit: 100415401
RAC: 13030

Why did KGB officers always

Why did KGB officers always travel in threes?

One who could read, one who could write, and the third to watch over those two dangerous intellectuals.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 5586
Credit: 7673222881
RAC: 1749187

How many therapits does it

How many therapits does it take to change a light bulb?

 

 

1

But the light bulb has to really want to change.

 

 

 

How many light bulbs does it take to change a therapist?

 

 

 

3

1 to have a bright idea.

1 to throw some light on it.

1 to come on when the therapist "gets it" (lights up over the therapist's head).

Tom M

A Proud member of the O.F.A.  (Old Farts Association).  Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.® (Garrison Keillor)

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