TLPTP - Make us laugh edition

mikey
mikey
Joined: 22 Jan 05
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David S wrote:Only very

David S wrote:

Only very slightly tangentially related to Mikey's ambulance story, in that it involves an ambulance and not at all funny really... some time around New Year's, an Aurora ambulance was returning to quarters from the hospital here in Naperville* at about 2:30 a.m. when they collided with a car at a major intersection, rolling itself on its side and knocking the car into a traffic light pole and a row of cars on display at the edge of a dealer's lot. Follow-up news story several weeks later reported that the paramedic driving the ambulance was ticketed for failure to stop at a red light. The driver of the car was still in the hospital. So now, I imagine she will sue the paramedic and the City of Aurora, and the city will also have to get a new ambulance** and pay for the repairs to the traffic light and all the damaged cars.

 

*Not sure why; they have a hospital in Aurora too, not too far away.

**It was bent downward behind the cab.

Sometimes ambulances go to different hospitals  because the closest one is full, or about to be full, and the resources can be over taxed by just one more patient. Other times because a Dr is available at one place but only 'on call' at a loser one. 'On call' for a Dr can mean sleeping at home, on the golf course, whatever just not physically at the hospital but available by phone and if you can convince them it's worth their time they will come in, eventually.

Quote:
It has taken me even longer to write this than normal because I'm on a train on a route notorious for its bad track. I'm riding the Cardinal to Indianapolis, sitting the station there for a few hours, and then riding the Hoosier State back to Chicago. The reason I'm doing this now is that Iowa Pacific Holdings discovered it wasn't making any money by providing the equipment and on board service and it will revert to Amtrak equipment and service on March 1. Anyway, I'm making even more typos than normal because of the computer bouncing around under my hands, not to mention how much it's jittering in front of my eyes. (And then there's the spell checker red-squiggly-lining what I think is a perfectly good word, but it's harder than normal to check to make sure I spelled it how I think I did.) And that's all with the browser set to 120% size.

You did very well in spite of all that!!

"Naperville" isn't that the one that has the Police Department on tv showing all the women you know have and the jobs they are doing? Of course when they talk to some of the women they say they have been there long enough to retire, so intimating they have a bunch of 'newly hired women' is a bit misleading.

Chris S
Chris S
Joined: 27 Aug 05
Posts: 2469
Credit: 19550265
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Well that lot was a laugh a

Well that lot was a laugh a minute for Katherine :-)

The truth is that the Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots have yet to get the joke.

Boom boom

 

 

 

 

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

JumpinJohnny
JumpinJohnny
Joined: 4 Apr 13
Posts: 138
Credit: 680279
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Chris S_2 wrote: The truth

Chris S_2 wrote:

The truth is that the Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots have yet to get the joke.

 

"Truth is" that hundreds of cultures through out the ages have had bagpipes as far back as ancient Greece. It very well could have been that a Basque whale boat stopped along the Irish shores to entertain the Scotsman on holiday with bagpipe music.  (Where else would a scotsman go on holiday?)

 

Betreger
Betreger
Joined: 25 Feb 05
Posts: 992
Credit: 1593252338
RAC: 777464

Were any potatos involved?

Were any potatos involved?

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
Moderator
Joined: 1 Dec 05
Posts: 6590
Credit: 319041416
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JumpinJohnny wrote:It very

JumpinJohnny wrote:
It very well could have been that a Basque whale boat stopped along the Irish shores to entertain the Scotsman on holiday with bagpipe music.  (Where else would a scotsman go on holiday?)

How nice of the Basque man to have gone all that way ...... :-))

 

Grumpy-old doctor to way-too-clever-young medical student : Now don't be impertinent young whippersnapper ! I have forgotten more than you know !

Way-too-clever-young medical student : Yep, Alzheimer's will do that all right .....

BOOM BOOM ... yeah, fail that smarta**e

We had a professor who would never give anyone 100% - even if no errors had been made. He would reckon you'd spelled your own name wrong if it came to that.

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Phil-Pi
Phil-Pi
Joined: 7 Jan 17
Posts: 32
Credit: 867513
RAC: 0

A proud and confident genius

A proud and confident genius makes a bet with an idiot. The genius says, "Hey idiot, every question I ask you that you don't know the answer, you have to give me $5. And if you ask me a question and I can't answer yours I will give you $5,000." The idiot says, "Okay." The genius then asks, "How many continents are there in the world?" The idiot doesn't know and hands over the $5. The idiot says, "Now me ask: what animal stands with two legs but sleeps with three?" The genius tries and searches very hard for the answer but gives up and hands over the $5000. The genius says, "Dang it, I lost. By the way, what was the answer to your question?" The idiot hands over $5.

 

Chris S
Chris S
Joined: 27 Aug 05
Posts: 2469
Credit: 19550265
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Not bad, not bad

Not bad, not bad :-)

Kangaroo?

OK I owe you $5 ......

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

Phil-Pi
Phil-Pi
Joined: 7 Jan 17
Posts: 32
Credit: 867513
RAC: 0

Did you hear about the guy

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

Chris S
Chris S
Joined: 27 Aug 05
Posts: 2469
Credit: 19550265
RAC: 0

Patient - I keep thinking I

Patient - I keep thinking I 'm a pair of curtains.

Doctor - Well pull yourself together man!

 

 

Waiting for Godot & salvation :-)

Why do doctors have to practice?
You'd think they'd have got it right by now

Phil-Pi
Phil-Pi
Joined: 7 Jan 17
Posts: 32
Credit: 867513
RAC: 0

If you ever get cold, just

If you ever get cold, just stand in the corner of a room for a while. They're normally about 90 degrees.

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