Humor Including Jokes, Puns, Shaggy dog stories etc.

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 918
Credit: 96,194,689
RAC: 5,760

Its another hot day, so I've

Its another hot day, so I've taken all my clothes off and opened every window.
I feel so much better, although the other people on the bus don't seem so pleased.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

Kavanagh wrote: Its another

Kavanagh wrote:

Its another hot day, so I've taken all my clothes off and opened every window.
I feel so much better, although the other people on the bus don't seem so pleased.

Oops...

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

If you notice your ears

If you notice your ears "ringing".

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why don't you answer it????

 

 

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

Many years ago (in the 1970s)

Many years ago (in the 1970s) someone wrote a story about project management, databases, and the process of building the Great Pyramid.

It was published in a weekly called Computer World (made on News Print paper).

 

The Database records were recorded on clay tablets.  And were stored on a FILO (First In Last Out basis).

When the clay tablets at the "bottom" of the database crunched and fell to dust....  we had...

 

 

The First Database Crash!!!!

 

No, I didn't make it up.  Someone else did...

Tom M

 

 

 

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 918
Credit: 96,194,689
RAC: 5,760

Police have confirmed that

Police have confirmed that the world's slowest talking criminal has just completed a three year sentence.

Richard

Mike Hewson
Mike Hewson
Moderator
Joined: 1 Dec 05
Posts: 6,375
Credit: 195,455,051
RAC: 166,724

Ah Tom. Yes, very good ! I

Ah Tom. Yes, very good !

I remember a paper magazine called 'BYTE' that would talk of the all-virtuous new operating system called MS-DOS and it's magical qualities ( cue laughter .... ). IIRC then came extended/expanded memory which broke the 640KB barrier, plus the amazing high density floppies that held a massive 1.44MB - I kid you not. I fondly remember the thrill of buying (a) my first hard drive and (b) a mouse followed by (c) a 16 color graphics adapter and (d) color monitor.

Cheers, Mike.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter ...

... and my other CPU is a Ryzen 5950X :-) Blaise Pascal

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

Kavanagh wrote: Police have

Kavanagh wrote:

Police have confirmed that the world's slowest talking criminal has just completed a three year sentence.

Groan!

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 918
Credit: 96,194,689
RAC: 5,760

Split up with my girlfriend

Split up with my girlfriend Lorraine today. She found out I'd been seeing Carrie-Lee behind her back.

I can see Carrie-Lee now Lorraine has gone.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

Kavanagh wrote: Split up

Kavanagh wrote:

Split up with my girlfriend Lorraine today. She found out I'd been seeing Carrie-Lee behind her back.

I can see Carrie-Lee now Lorraine has gone.

I believe you favor "Dry" humor :)

Tom M

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 2,647
Credit: 4,379,438,000
RAC: 6,154,307

Has anyone got a good

Has anyone got a good Wednesday ("hump day") joke?

Live long and Prosper.

A proud member of the O.F.A. (Old Farts Association)

It ain't the heat it's the humility. - Yogi Berra

 

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.