Humor Including Jokes, Puns, Shaggy dog stories etc.

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

This from a Riddles, Riddles,

This from a Riddles, Riddles, Riddles book by Joesph Lemming.

 

 

Who was the most popular Actor in the Bible?

 

 

 

 

Samson.

 

He brought the house down.

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

Tom M wrote: This from a

Tom M wrote:

This from a Riddles, Riddles, Riddles book by Joesph Lemming.

Why is the inside of everything so mysterious?

 

 

 

 

 

Because we can't make it out.

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 537
Credit: 94,084,280
RAC: 12,336

Just came across this, and

Just came across this, and thought you lot would like it:
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'

Richard

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 3,627
Credit: 111,139,797
RAC: 0

Did you hear the one about

Did you hear the one about the overworked muffler?

It was exhausted!

<Ba-da-boom!>

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

RandyC
RandyC
Joined: 18 Jan 05
Posts: 3,627
Credit: 111,139,797
RAC: 0

Two peanuts were walking down

Two peanuts were walking down the street in the big city. One was assaulted. <A salted... peanut>

Seti Classic Final Total: 11446 WU.

Kavanagh
Kavanagh
Joined: 29 Oct 06
Posts: 537
Credit: 94,084,280
RAC: 12,336

I just found out that Albert

I just found out that Albert Einstein really existed!

I thought he was a theoretical physicist.

Richard

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

Kavanagh wrote: I just found

Kavanagh wrote:

I just found out that Albert Einstein really existed!

I thought he was a theoretical physicist.

Groan!

 

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

Two oldsters were discussing

Two oldsters were discussing their love lives.

The first said: "How often do you make love?"

The second said "Twice".

The first got an I am amazed look on his face.

 

 

 

The second said "Yup.  Once in the Spring and once in the Fall."

 

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

RandyC wrote: Two peanuts

RandyC wrote:

Two peanuts were walking down the street in the big city. One was assaulted. <A salted... peanut>

Flinch!

 

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

Tom M
Tom M
Joined: 2 Feb 06
Posts: 1,117
Credit: 1,918,234,838
RAC: 4,641,871

RandyC wrote: Did you hear

RandyC wrote:

Did you hear the one about the overworked muffler?

It was exhausted!

<Ba-da-boom!>

With the drum shot that sounds like it could have been on the Late show....  :)

Lovely pun.

Over the hill?  What hill?  I don't REMEMBER any hill...
A Proud member of the O.F.A. (I've forgotten what that stands for.... ;)

 

 

 

 

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